Knowing What is Important in Life

The issue of stress is becoming a growing concern for many people. Every morning as I flip the papers, all I see in the news is about how bad the recession is or which company is axing how many people. When we come to work, we face the stress of knowing that we may be next on the chopping block as companies go on "cost reduction" exercises on the premise that such reductions will aid in sustainability of the company. We face paycuts and lay offs which are becoming a reality and a part of our daily lives regardless of whether we are the ones undertaking the act or the subject of the action. The stress levels are rising.

Through this stress, it is very simple to overlook many things in our lives as we battle to retain our jobs and maintain our wealth; we worry if we will lose our jobs, we battle and jockey at work for positions, we essentially undertake a battle both inside and outside. Today, work is becoming the central topic of our stress. Also, this stress is becoming a part of our lives at home. Through it all, though, we forget one very critical aspect of our lives; work is a means for us to survive (i.e. to sustain our daily needs) but should not become such a stressful activity that we overlook more important things in our lives.

What is more important than your job and money, you ask? Well, let's put it this way...health and your loved ones. Take a look around you for a minute and look at your attitude towards work compared with your attitude towards your family. I was very surprised when I first began working in Singapore 3 years ago that it was common for many people to work extremely long hours and even after the long hours, work is still brought home. This shocked me as in North America, an employee was only required to work 40 hours a week and this is your only obligation to the company. The result of such long hours here is that family time is now missing with kids being raised by surrogate parents (e.g. maids, nannies, and grand parents) instead of being by their natural parents, lower marriage rates etc. Couple this with the current stress, the resulting mixture is a very disjointed family life.

What I am trying to say here is that sometimes it is good to take a step back and look at the situation with your life and take stock of what is important. Money is good but ultimately when you pass on, this all becomes nothing and amounts to nothing. Money and possessions do not become you and the more you crave, the more stress you get beacuse you will never be satisfied.

Your loved ones and your family, on the other hand, are the people who are your pillars of strength; they are ultimately the ones who stand by you regardless of whether you are rich or poor. In good times and bad times, your loved ones want to be with you and are willing to go through the troubled path with you. This, to me, is more valuable than the riches and possessions that I crave because the love from your loved ones is permanent but the satisfaction from possessions is temporary. Do be aware, though, that we cannot take this love and support from our loved ones for granted; we must invest into it so that it will stregthen.

The reason that I write this is because I have the love of a beautiful lady who has decided to stand by me through the good and bad times. I will admit that I am one of those who did bring the stress of my work back home but she has patiently listened to me. I have realized that this love is richer and more satisfying than all the possessions that I can possess because it is from someone who genuinely cares for me. I am filled with remorse sometimes, though, from my obssession with running the ratrace and being the "Best" but at the same time, putting undue stress on my relationship with her. Such stress and lack of consideration cannot be excused. I, for one, feel that it is time for a change!

So what can we do?

1. Learn to move away from bringing your work home. When at home, devote your time to your family; this is truly your treasure.
2. Talk about your problems at home with your loved one but don't drag it out into a protracted session or keep ranting and raving about work; nobody is interested in pure complaining with no conclusion. Also, your loved one is human and has feelings too; you are not the only one with problems.
3. Learn to relax around your loved ones. Remember: Everything will take care of itself in its own time; this has always been the way the universe revolved since the beginning of time. We are not God and we cannot change things but we can trust that things will happen in its own time. For example, since the 1900s, we have seen many recessions come and go but we are still here; we need to trust that life goes on.

I, for one, have decided that I will take a fresh outlook with regards to my life. I shall begin to put what is truly important to me, my wonderful darling, ahead of eveything else. Building a life and family with her is more important and I can trust that everything else will take care of itself.

This, I believe, is the true calling of my life. Start today and truly understand what is important in your life. Take stock and you will see that work stress is nothing that we cannot handle. I know what is important in my life now, do you?